The Editors

These are my editors. I have disguised people's identity because it amused me. And it seems like the smart thing to do, as I don't want to get whacked. You can try to identify these folks by name to me in a private email, but I warn you, it might cost you dearly!

The Grammarian:
She is superb at catching subject-verb agreement, to the point of infuriating me that I could make so many mistakes. My MSes are polished because of her, and I would never consider a work 'complete' until she had the opportunity to paint it red.

The English Major:
This kind gentleman verifies the literary-ness of my piece. Does it have enough allusions to Ulysses? Do phrases alliterate well? He is a wordsmith king, and some of my favourite sentences are crafted in his forge.

The Playwright:
The work is what is on display and it must be evaluated, digested, humanified, compared with Chekov... and ice cream. Did I mention ice cream? People, interaction, the truth of human nature! Nothing short of that will satisfy this most distinquished of critics.

La Française:
She is my editor of all things French (and all of my works have *some* French in them). She is also a cautious reader, and sees minute details that evade the native English speaker. And from her I learned that French dialogue puts a space between the last word and the question mark, semicolon, and exclamation point. Betcha didn't know that, did you?

The Wife:
The most important editor. She is the first editor, and sometimes the last. If it doesn't pass her muster, the work never moves on. I must either rework it or kill it. There is nothing funny about this, so I won't even try to make a joke(even this post barely passed her critical eye). She is my best supporter and an honest critic. Bribing her (which is nigh impossible) could make or break one of my stories.

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